Segmented

This morning, I have the urge to do what I want to do. Mind you, that means knocking some things off my list that aren’t categorized under putting-out-fires—we all know fires should be taken care of first. But these other less-than-important things niggle at me 24/7. I need to quilt JJ’s middle school quilt. I need to make some calls for medical insurance. I need to organize my office. But these are all things that can be put off for the dishes, dinner, and laundry.

Sometimes, I think I’m a pie. I’ve segmented myself so thin that a slice of my time isn’t satisfying; it just doesn’t fill me up.

…At the end of today, the Result…

I compromised. I did the dishes. I put in a load of laundry. But we scavenged for dinner so I could quilt. I got a big chunk done. There is something about sewing/quilting which soothes my soul. My main job is to write but it takes a long time to get a manuscript done. But sitting down at the sewing machine and touching fabric and watching it come together is satisfying. I enjoyed my slice of time today.
Sewing Completed—Tote Basket
What’s for dinner—Roast, potatoes, carrots in the pressure cooker
Vegetable of the day—Carrots and, of course, romaine
Cleaning Project—JJ’s bathroom

 

Project 51
 

"How quick come the reasons for approving what we like." —Persuasion

My days are filled with responsibilities. The list of things I have to do is endless. When I dare to peek above the pile of responsibilities and ask that taboo question:

What do I want to do for myself today? How do I really want to spend my time?

I usually don’t have a good answer. Why is this? I’ve come to the conclusion it has to do with spending my days caring for others. I can’t even remember what it is I want to do for myself.

I know I’m not alone.

This blog is for all you overachievers, mothers who feel like they don’t have a life, and those who wish for a simpler time. My daughter actually came up with this idea. This past year, I celebrated a major birthday, my 50^th and had several goals for myself. One of those goals was simple—make a quilt for myself. This didn’t happen although I made several quilts for others. My daughter suggested, for the next year, I sew only for me. And to blog about it. I loved the idea. However, I think it’s more complicated than that.

I still have to keep the house running, go to work, and care for the family. Dinner still has to get made, the laundry folded, and the toothpaste bought. How do I balance doing something for myself with my long list of responsibilities? I don’t know. Balance has eluded me for so long I’m not sure it exists.

Ah, now here lies the question…How do us modern day Jane Austen’s find balance? How did Jane Austen find it for herself? Yes, she never married and never had children. But she had her mother, her sister, nieces and nephews and found time for them. Still, she carved out a piece of life just for her.

One of the things I do for myself is write. I’ve written four novels and am currently agented. I’m a serious writer but like most writers, it’s hard to snatch that part of the day and put pen to paper. I want to be more like Jane Austen and write. What I want to do matters. I just have to convince myself.

So here starts what I call PROJECT 51. I will reclaim my life this year and find balance. Every day, I’ll have a plan. I have my writing career. I have a sewing plan. There is dinner, a small cleaning project and what I like to call the Vegetable of the Day (my way of making vegetables more important.)  So here it goes…

End of Day 1…Progress towards Balance

Sewing Completed—9-four patch blue jean quilt blocks

What’s for dinner—Chicken Wild Rice Soup

Vegetable of the day—Broccoli

Cleaning Project—Breakfast table cleared of papers